Shortly after you get engaged the second question that usually starts to pop up (after the inevitable chorus of “when are you getting married?”) is “who will be in the wedding party?” Whether you decide on two loved ones, an entire gaggle of friends and family members, or none at all here are some of our best tips when considering how to handle the wedding party.

• Think about the size of your wedding – having an intimate elopement with 20 friends and family? Then a smaller wedding party fits the scale. Planning a large gathering of 350? Then the bigger the better!
• Keep communication open and honest – it can be an honor to be asked to be part of someone’s wedding party, but sometimes there are other factors at play preventing someone to fully be present. The time, finances and traveling involved make the role of bridesmaid or groomsmen pretty daunting.
• Don’t ask out of obligation, guilt or fear – ask because your wedding genuinely wouldn’t be the same without them.
• Children are cute but not required – flower girls and ring bearers and the like are adorable but if you don’t have kids in your life who feel like a perfect fit in that role then don’t force it!
• The rules are, there are no rules – at the end of the day it’s your wedding and you know what’s the best reflection of you and your partner. If you choose to have a wedding party, tailor it to your vision. You don’t have to have just one Best Man or Maid of Honor, heck the Best Man doesn’t even have to be male.

Below, check out some wedding parties of our past couples in all different shapes and sizes!

{Photos in this post by Michael and Carina, Jen Fariello, Nikki Santerre, A Bryan Photo, Sam Stroud, Liz Fogarty + Patricia Lyons}